Well, I haven’t been blogging much recently because I’ve been running around like a maniac trying to figure out how to be an assistant sports editor at my newspaper. From now on, I might INTENTIONALLY not blog because I have decided I hate hockey.

The Devils hold a 1-goal lead on the Rangers for 55 minutes and 14 seconds, and then the player I dislike the most in hockey history scores to tie it up, and it all goes down the drain. Chris Drury already has 1 game-winning goal against New Jersey this year — which is 1 too many, bee-tee-double u — and 22 goals overall, and three Devils sit around the net so mesmerized by the puck they forget that he’s wide open behind them. You’re 0-5 against the Rags this year, why can’t you play defense for 4:46 longer??? And now you’re 0-6. (Sorry, had to steal that gag from TMQ).

Granted, I’ve never played hockey, so maybe the trio of dumbfounded Devils on the game-tying goal were doing what they were supposed to and I wasn’t aware. As such, I won’t call out any of the transgressors other than to say that some of their names rhyme with phrases like “fish rev skis” and “look, Hank”. PS, I really wish the Jersey shooters would have done less looking at Hank, a.k.a. Henrik “the Swedish meatball” Lundqvist, and more scoring on him in the shootout.

As for Drury, who I’d derisively refer to as “the muffin man” if it weren’t an insult to muffins everywhere, this guy seriously has to have it in for me. Not only is he from Fairfield County, Connecticut, a place I despise only slightly less than Dean Wormer despises Delta House… not only did he play hockey at BU and make me want to throw things out of my BC dorm window… now he plays for the bleeping Rangers and, naturally, sticks it to the Devils. In the odd chance that he ever reads this, just tell him to drop me an e-mail, and I’ll send him my whereabouts so he swing by for an encore of violating my mother while pouring sugar in my gas tank. (Sorry, borrowed that one from “Clerks”, and also had to clean it up a bit).

Special thanks to either Doc or Chico — I can’t remember which one said it because a rush of anger mysteriously flooded my brain and wiped out all rational thought — for noting that Nigel Dawes was 0-for-1 against Brodeur in shootouts nanoseconds before he scored the clincher. Other than that, surprise surprise, no beef with Marty yet again. Are his kids old enough to skate yet? They can’t have any less offensive firepower than the rest of the Devils did tonight, and they might not have all their shots get blocked by defenders because they’re lower to the ice. Plus, having the Brodeur genes don’t hurt.

Speaking of jeans, I’m gonna go light mine on fire since I don’t feel like wearing anything blue tomorrow, or ever again for that matter. Thank goodness I’m also a Jets fan instead of a Giants fan.